Month: May 2007

Have you ever thought of what it would be like had you been born into a different family? Actually I know people who feel that the family they now have is definitely not the family they want, but somewhere out there is the right family for them. And had they had an opportunity to be in that family with a different mother, another father, a perfect sibling their life would have been wonderful. Certainly much more so than now. But is that true? We see people who are born into families that from all indications look as though they’re the right families for anybody to have been born into. They appear to have “it all.” But wait – look more closely.

Yes, look more closely at everything. Maybe we’re exactly where we’re supposed to be in this lifetime. From all indications, it seems that we’re here to work things out in our life, and the family we find ourselves with is the right family in this particular lifetime. The challenges, the pains, the sufferings are part of life here, and it’s doubtful whether we humans would accomplish anything without them. There’s no escaping them-no matter the family we’re part of-because those challenges, those pains, those sufferings are what we need for our greater growth. And ultimately will make life sweeter, richer, happier, and give us a better understanding of ourselves and our world-if we allow it.

And if we believe in a higher power, and the evolution of a soul, and the orderliness underneath the chaos, then it makes sense to believe that we’re right where we’re supposed to be. That if we would accept where we are, and use our energy to make our life a work of art, if we do that, and not focus on what we think we should have had, we’ll soon see the bigger picture. We’re the one who makes that happen for ourselves, no one else can. It would seem that human beings are on a quest. And the quest is to evolve. To appreciate and enjoy what is before us serves our quest beautifully, yearning for what wasn’t and isn’t, wastes our precious energy.

“Everybody thinks of changing humanity and nobody thinks of changing himself.” -Leo Tolstoy

“You could not discover the frontiers of the soul, even if you traveled every road to do so; such is the depth of its meaning” -Heraclitus of Ephesus

“To know how to live is my trade and my art.” -Michel De Montaigne

Physicist Roger Penrose has said that the chance of an ordered univese happening at random is 10 to the 10 to the 30th against-a number so large that if you programmed a compjuter to write a million zeros per second, it would take a million times the age of the universe just to write the number down.

“Ultimately, one has to wonder how scientists who assume the profound presence of patterns in nature in order to practice their very art can also assume that those patterns developed randomly, from nothingness. Patterns imply intelligence, and an ordered creation implies an orderer.” – Andy Fletcher, Letter to the Editor, Harper’s (from The Road Within)

I’m a night owl and late night phone calls are perfect for me. But when a late night call comes from an early bird, it’s necessary to carefully listen as they usually have something they want to say and can’t fall asleep til they talk it out. Ms. Early Bird was very tired when she called, and that in itself suggests the importance of paying attention to her by carefully listening. She was so tired that the number of yawns coming from the other end of the phone nearly put me to sleep. Ms. Early Bird wears her heart on her sleeve and helps anyone in need. In the process she wears herself to a frazzle and needs to recoup. There should be a beautiful spa for people who always seem to put themselves last in the game of life. They can talk with people who will understand them and at the same time renew themselves in luxurious surroundings. And it should be mandatory for them to go at least once a year. That’s the only way their own selves will be taken care of.

There are times when I’m a wee bit concerned about Ms. Early Bird. The reason is that in putting everyone’s needs before her own. it’s very easy for people to take advantage of her. She’s modest and doesn’t appreciate her own worth, When you recognize the goodness in her, you want to protect her. That’s an impossible task because this gentle one doesn’t see that she’s doing too much at the expense of herself. Trying to convince her that care of self is a good thing makes you look like a cad, and you sense that the thought is occuring to her that maybe she’s called the wrong person. So what is there to do for Ms. Early Bird? Simply listen to her.

But maintaining ourselves in a state of balance is vital. Otherwise we’ll become a doormat and basically we’re telling the Universe that that’s the role we intend to play in life. This could mean that we’ll be the one skipped over when it comes to receiving the things that bring happiness (“your kind of happy.” – Shadowlands), harmony, beauty, freedom, etcetera, into our life. Helping others is a good thing, of course, but being a doormat is not. Giving and receiving-a balance-is important. And now perhaps you’re thinking of someone such as Mother Teresa who, we have read, gave of herself many times over. Possibly her spiritual life gave her the balance she needed. And it’s doubtful that she would neglect that part of her life, so she was assured of balance. Mother Teresa’s story would seem like a category reserved for an entirely different way of life, an evening’s worth of discussion.

I found out that Ms. Early Bird was simply exhausted from a grueling week of commitments. Of course, she worked a few additional shifts because colleagues needed time off – she was spent into fatigue. It would be nice if simply listening helped put things into perspective for her.

“If you are losing your leisure, look out; you may be losing your soul.” -Logan Pearsall Smith